Thursday, September 25, 2008

I thought this was funny!

Pregnancy, Estrogen, and Women PREGNANCY Q & A & more!

Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.

Q: I'm two months pregnant now.When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth.

Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?

Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure.Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q: When is the best time to get an epidural ?
A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.

Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word 'alimony' means anything to you.

Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.

Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.

Q: Our baby was born last week.When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.

1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet.
3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
5. You 're using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says: 'How's my driving-call 1- 800-'.
6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
7.Everyone seems to have just landed here from 'outer space'
8. You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
9. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.
10.You live in Dante's inferno and your husband lives in Antarctica.

10. Cats' facial expressions.
9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors.
8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds.
7. Fat clothes.
6. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time.
5. The difference between beige, ecru, cream, off-white, and eggshell.
4. Cutting your hair to make it grow.
3. Eyelash curlers.
2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made.
AND, the Number One thing only women understand :1.OTHER WOMEN

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

My 1st Cowboy game!!

Yesterday I got a phone call from my hubby asking what I was doing later. I said, ugh! laundry. To which he replied, "Want to go to the game tonight?" What? Are you kidding me? Of course, but wait...we don't have tickets so how are we going? His manager at work gave us two of the company tickets for him doing a good job at work. Sweet!!! I am on my way!

We get to the game and find our seats. We thought...oh, maybe mid upper level or something. We were on the 5 yrd line 19 rows up. I can see Romo's face!!

This was the perfect game to be my first. It was packed full of drama. There were long touchdown passes, bad calls, stupid plays, interceptions, fumbles, fumble that resulted in an Eagles touchdown (thanks Tony), a douche bag who ran onto the field and stood on the star in the middle of play who was promptly arrested, and a stadium crowd that could be heard from space.All in all, a great Monday night game and I will never forget it because next year the new stadium opens and we will not be able to afford it.